The Man in the Moon

Said the Raggedy Man, on a hot afternoon:

"My!

Sakes!

What a lot o' mistakes

Some little folks makes on The Man in the Moon!

But people that's b'en to see  him like me, 

And calls on him frequent and intimuttly,

Might drop a few facts that would interest you

Clean!

Through!—

If you wanted 'em to—

Some actual  facts that might interest you!

"O The Man in the Moon has a crick in his back;

Whee!

Whimm!

Aint you sorry for him?

And a mole on his nose that is purple and black;

And his eyes are so weak that they water and run

If he dares to dream  even he looks at the sun—

So he jes' dreams of stars, as the doctors advise—

My!

Eyes!

But isn't he wise—

To jes' dream of stars, as the doctors advise?

"And the Man in the Moon has a boil on his ear—

Whee!

Whing!

What a singular thing!

I know! but these facts are authentic, my dear—

There's a boil on his ear; and a corn on his chin—

He calls it a dimple—but dimples stick in—

Yet it might be a dimple turned over, you know!

Whang!

Ho!

Why, certainly so—

It might be a dimple turned over, you know!

"And The Man in the Moon has a rheumatic knee—

Gee!

Whizz!

What a pity that is!

And his toes have worked round where his heels ought to be—

So whenever he wants to go North he goes South, 

And comes back with porridge-crumbs all round his mouth,

And he brushes them off with a Japanese fan,

Whing!

Whann!

What a marvelous man!

What a very remarkably marvelous man!

And the Man in the Moon," sighed The Raggedy Man,

"Gits!

So!

Sullonesome, you know—

(Up there by hisse'f sence creation began!)

That when I call on him and then come away,

He grabs me and holds me and begs me to stay—

Till—Well!  if it wasn't fer Jimmy-cum-jim, 

Dadd!

Limb!

I'd go pardners with him—

Jes' jump my job here and be pardners with him!"